First and Foremost...

I guess I need to accept that it is possible to say, "Oh we got a spot up close- Thank God," and really mean something by it. I tend to be thankful for big picture things... maybe because I am so suspicious of my subjectivity. I figure I should be wary of being thankful that I am not like other people or being thankful for the destruction of my enemies. But this is how petty I am...

Acolyte 1-Thank God the bus was late today; I almost missed it.
Acolyte 2- Dammit I'm gonna be late to my job interview.

Thanks for this, thanks for that- I am so great the sun shines only on me. I am the end and glory of creation; I deserve so much. Pardon me, nobody, you're hindering my ascent. Excuse me, other nobody, in what way do you serve my gain? Oh you don't, well get out of my face because I am busy thanking God for stuff; if you have nothing to contribute to the list you must have no purpose. I say, " Good day to you madam."

"Thank God, we're not having chicken again." "Thank God we didn't miss the previews." "Thank God that's over." "Thank God Foucault protects the particular from metaphysical imperialism." I get it. I'm the one with the problem if I don't see it as simple as that.

Why can't I get over that? What a baby.

So, I'm watching the sun come up and thankful for the morning and a day that has never existed before. I thank God for the relief I feel that the CPT members are not dead. I thank God that more than my relief is at stake. But I can't keep making a list.

I just have a sense of my smallness, God's presence, and feel grateful.