Gay Bomb

"A Berkeley watchdog organization that tracks military spending said it uncovered a strange U.S. military proposal to create a hormone bomb that could purportedly turn enemy soldiers into homosexuals and make them more interested in sex than fighting."

CBS News

It turns out the Pentagon is run by Jr. Highers.

This explains the new uniforms made of rubber- unfortunately we couldn't get our enemies to wear suits of glue...

Or maybe the strange obsession with a caricaturized homosexuality explains the suits of rubber.

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I hadn't realized it was a challenge to get soldiers interested in sex. In fact,* certain strains of chlamydia are so evolved/intelligently designed that they hover in clouds over military barracks.

*By "In fact," I mean "as a joke."

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How's this add anything?

I thought that fighting was often a surrogate for sex. A twisted, sad, disturbing, and destructive surrogate- but surrogate nonetheless. So how does making soldiers more interested in sex take them away from fighting? Never mind the history of phallic weaponry, enhancing codpieces, etc..., just watch how intensely homo-erotic Ultimate Fighting is.