I Feel The Sky Tumbling Down, Tumbling Down
So about our earthquake yesterday... It was the first in a long time I wasn't able to just sit through and ride out. Thanks a lot, baby!
Anyway, I'm not the head of a religious empire so I am not quite sure how to go about attributing the blame for said earthquake. Things don't just happen do they? There has to be someone to blame, but I don't know exactly how to find that someone. However, there is not a problem so complex that the wiki-esque democratizing power of the internets in conjunction with oversimplified Biblical interpretation can't solve it.
So to that end, I will suggest possible reasons that God may have been judging Chino Hills with an earthquake and together, we will pick the most likely reason... I should make this a contest.
Let's see... hmmm... Oh there was the reintroduction of the plan to house mentally ill inmates at the Chino facility. That made a lot of locals angry...
Maybe...
Oh yeah, there are a lot of empty homes in the area as a result of the worsening housing market, poor economy, and mortgage scams making neighborhoods ugly and God doesn't like ugly... Well if you take a view of the world popularized by the likes of CS Lewis wherein white and beautiful equals good...
Oh! Maybe the rash of coyote attacks in Chino Hills has something to do with it. No, that sounds more like judgment than the reason for judgment...
Hey, the city council just cancelled a contract to build a fountain at the city hall. That could be something.
What else, what else?
Turning to the Bible, Isaiah suggests that in at least one instance earthquakes may be the consequence of vapid but showy worship overseen by empty-headed leaders. Sure, but Chino Hills is home to the best church in the world, so it's probably not that...
I dunno.
Anyway, feel free to leave your vote for the most likely reason for judgment, or if you have nothing to say about that-
Does anybody in the internets know how to buy other region/country's iTunes content? Failing that, can anybody in the internets explain why iTunes would allow me to search other region iTunes stores and then not allow me to buy content from that region?
2 comments:
You know, I don't know much about Chino Hills, but if most loud-mouthed Christians are right, God is most angry about gay people. When God is angry, it's usually about gay people. Gay = about a 10 on God's anger scale, adultery and killing have moved down to a about 4 (premarital sex is a 9, abortion is an 8, Marilyn Manson is a 7...).
The most reasonable conclusion to draw from this, surely, is that there were more people engaging in "gay" activities in Chino Hills than at any other point in its history and that God reacted as any temperamental God would-- indiscriminate destruction.
Or perhaps it's a sign of the second coming. Crap, am I left behind?
And it's possible, given the thoroughness (read silliness) of our categorizations, that gay doesn't just mean same gender physical intimacy or genital stimulation (I have to be specific here) but goes on to include things that we might call a "Gay Lifestyle"- things like going to brunch, watching Sex and the City or anything on BRAVO, enjoying honeydew, washing one's hair, checking to see if your socks match, remembering your friends' birthdays, etc... I know there's a lot of that going on in Chino Hills.
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