Really? Redux

At it again.


Okay, so it's not a synagogue, or techinically a street corner. But they do seem to have received their reward.

Harriet Miers, White Sox, Britney Spears baby, Wilma

The Hits Just Keep On Coming

So I mentioned that somebody stumbled across this site looking for pornography. I didn't mean to suggest that anyone I don't know who happened to stop by was looking for porn. I understand there are other ways to get here, so, Cityfrog of Australia, you're clean as far as I know. I just thought it strange that at least one person looking specifically for dirty pictures, stories or whatever thought they would find that here.

According to the site meter data, most people arrive here directly or through other blogs. The number of hits referred by searches is down. To change that I will start most posts as I did this one (at least "most" for the time being). Take that.

My Grandpa Was A Communist and I'm A Christian

I was asked if it isn't better to say presidents in general are an unrepentant prideful lot. They certainly tend to be and I am among the first to say political leaders of any stripe generally drink freely and happily from the whore's cup. But in this case I say it is important to be specific. In this case we have to be clear that regardless of any anointing by the NAE or assurances from the Reichskirche to the contrary we are being... swindled. (Some more colorful imagery a la Ezekiel or Jeremiah would be appropriate but I don't want to lose anymore than I probably will.) If Evangelicals were not going whole hog for this president it might be enough to warn of the generic seduction of power. If Christians could maintain the "moral clarity" we had during the Clinton years it might be enough to say, "Tsk tsk, there they go again."

I will concede that it is not just this president that suffers from this. I will allow a generalization: it is the ethos of his administration that sees the public trust of government as a tool of private wealth. It is possessed by a clear and articulated desire to reduce government of every protective function except that which protects the advantage of the privileged. It is a machine as bad as many of the Gilded Age oiled with the blood of the poor and fueled by wealth. (How's that for hyperbole?) And unlike others sedated into apathy, we are not indifferent, we give our blessing, happy to be invited to the dance, giddy that the skinny plain girl would even be asked. They tell us we're special; Pastor Ted goes to Oval Office prayer meetings, Dr. Dobson gets secret phone calls.

It may surprise some to hear, but I like the US. I like many aspects of our political philosophy. One being our acknowledgment of sin as seen in our institutional checks and balances and that, though we sin, "we the people" can create a system where we better and better serve everyone rather than allow the already privileged few to suck the marrow from the lives of the many. Democracy is our ideal -not oligarchy- and as Christians we have the opportunity to speak uniquely and clearly to a government that will never be the church, that should not be a theocracy, that is ruled by the seductive power of evil but, according to our ideals, can be held in check. But what we have now is an administration that has hijacked the language of our faith to get us into bed. What he have now is a cabal of charlatans that know exactly what to say and do so we'll give it up. We have had it before, and we'll have it again, but this does not diminish that right now, this president- this administration- is committing a horrible fraud against the US- making a joke of democracy- and a lot of the church is making him breakfast.

How does Harriet "Best Governor Ever" Miers fit into this? Maybe she's a moment of clarity. Maybe she's the third act of "A Very Special Beverly Hills 90210" where we realize he never loved us, he just used us and we were all too happy to let him. Maybe the call for her withdrawal is a glimmer of self-respect. I'll make it clearer, maybe some of the church realized W Inc. isn't about conservatism or liberalism, it's about pandering to a loyal segment desperate for attention- throwing them a bone, patronizing the gullible to maintain power for the corporate sluts. This time the bone didn't do.

But this hasn't opened the president's eyes. The looming indictments, the myriad high level ethics and criminal investigations, the increasing number of political failures aren't leading to a denouement where the president and his ilk change their ways. That was the point of the last post. No repentance, no shame. Maybe that's expected, and like I said, not unique to this president. I just highlighted it because of our whorish devotion as the church to this administration- that's the point.

What will we do? Not much is my guess.

Roll Back the Mileage

If only I wrote everything I think. I thought the whole attorney client-executive privilege thing was the perfect opportunity to withdraw the Miers nomination. And that's what they're saying. Well that's what she's saying.

The president said her decision confirms his "deep respect and admiration" for her. His deep respect and admiration probably confirm how "cool" she thinks he is. I guess the president doesn't respect or admire Rumsfeld.
I can see that.

With perfect timing though, this is today's Daily Dig from the Bruderhof Communities.

Fallen man is not simply an imperfect creature who needs improvement. He is a rebel who must lay down his arms. Laying down your arms, surrendering, saying you are sorry, realizing that you have been on the wrong track and getting ready to start life over again from the ground floor - that is the only way out of a hole. This process of surrender - this movement full speed astern - is repentance.

CS Lewis

Surrendering, saying you are sorry, realizing that you have been on the wrong track and getting ready to start life over again from the ground floor repentance- that's good stuff, Clive.
But, this is not what the president has done. It is something he has been unable to do for some time. Miers, Iraq, prisoner abuses- no mistakes, no apologies, no escape.

Special Note +

Special Note: The Fake News Act is not law. Not yet anyway. I wasn't sure if that's clear.

Here's the plus: I've had dreams like this.

That's it for today.

I Make Up for It With a Game

The Senate Commerce Committee recently passed a bill (could I have come up with a more boring phrase to begin this post? but remember, there's a game at the end!) that, in its original language, would have required "disclosure to accompany any government-produced or -funded prepackaged VNR" in the form of a continuous identification of the source such as "Produced by the US Government."

The BIll as it passed does not have that requirement. Now the Bill is called the "Prepackaged News Story Announcement Act." (Yawn) All this means is that government funded propaganda does not have to be labeled such.

I couldn't decide which word above should serve as the appropriate gateway to the link so here's this: Source

Maybe you think this doesn't matter. You might be right.
Here's a fun and I'm sure completely unrelated game:

Guess who's the Nazi-

I'll give you a name and a description of what that person did. You guess if they were a Nazi or not. Are you ready?

Otto Reich- Directed a covert psychological propaganda unit, responsible for creating false news stories to garner public support for illegal military activities.
Answer

Heinrich Himmler- Literally a fertilizer salesman, early on in his political career, responsible for developing propaganda to garner support for his struggling political party, eventually became leader of a political police unit responsible for solidifying political power and eliminating dissent.
Answer

Joseph Goebbels- Political strategist, created a public image of the leader as political savior and defender against subversive cultural elements.
Answer


Cousin Kevin- The Who
Brat- Green Day
Girlfriend In a Coma- The Smiths
Love Me or Leave Me- Sarah Vaughan
Take Me Out- Franz Ferdinand
TIme On My Hands- Stan Getz

Doing Our Part or Connecting Some Dots

This story is a few days old. I wonder though, if the rest of the world isn't willing to cooperate, is bird flu the answer?

As the Sun at Noon

John Donne

He brought light out of darkness, not out of a lesser light, and he can bring thee summer out of winter, though thou hast no spring. Though in the ways of fortune, understanding, or conscience thou hast been benighted till now, wintered and frozen, clouded and eclipsed, damped and benumbed, smothered and stupefied, now God comes to thee, not as the dawning of the day, not as the bud of the spring, but as the sun at noon.  

Just beCause

I suppose if I were more important, it might have mattered that I didn't post anything yesterday.
If you have a minute,here's why.

It was kind of a moment of silence. Like I said, maybe if I were more important it might have mattered.

The number of dead coalition forces actually hit 2000 some time ago. I wrote about that when it happened. But those numbers included foreigners and we speak American. And somehow in American, zeroes make numbers magical. Two with three zeroes after it matter more than one preceded by a lie.

David Byrne Coming Through
Sail to the Moon- Radiohead
Packt Like Sardines in a Crushed Box- Radiohead
Light and Day/Reach for the Sun- The Polyphonic Spree
Brindisi- Luciano Pavarotti
Don't Worry About the Government- Talking Heads
Make My Funk the P Funk- Parliament

Jokes that aren't.

The Onion link here has the same sort of ring as this post in Bob Ramsey's blog.

Hmm... I see he is reading the same hippies as I am...


Gigantor- Helmet

Am I Listening?

Read this.
Paddy O. makes a point I should have made in my post. Not that I understood this point then. But I do now that he has helped me see something I did not see before.

I should be clearer in saying that while I begrudge being told what is inappropriate by an organization whose advisory board includes Pat Boone and Billy Ray Cyrus, it is okay, in fact it is good to clearly state what is inappropriate for families. I guess I am bothered by what they deem appropriate for families. Did you read this yet? I agree, we do need to know what is good and also what we should avoid. As for the PTC's picks for "Worsts," there is not a show on the list I would let my 5 year old nephew watch. More than half of them are shows I won't watch. But the same is true of the "Bests." Only "Bernie Mac" and "Everybody Hates Chris" are good, not because of the "depiction of a loving, close knit family" and other "traditional values," well, not only because of those things, but they are well written, honest, touching but not sappy, mostly original, wholesome but not preachy, fun shows. Bernie Mac's addresses to "America" are one of the best things on TV. (Maybe there's something better, I don't have cable.) The transition titles and text add ins are smart and funny, the acting is great- especially from kid actors, and "Everybody Hates Chris," while it may be the "Wonder Years" a la Chris Rock, I liked "The Wonder Years." (Though it's not just the "Wonder Years" a la Chris Rock). Like blueberries, these shows are good and good for you. Which though I am doing it now, should not be seen as too separate.
On the other hand, the other shows on their "Best" list are shallow, pointless, testaments to greed, vanity, or empty-headed silliness. If I'm going to do the food thing again they are the... Olestra Ruffles of TV.
And as Le Var would say, "But don't take my word for it."

Also note another link in the blog roll. The new link is to a blog written by one of the people providentially present in my youth saying what I needed to hear before I knew I needed to hear it.

What do you think would be the point of a site like i-am-asian.com? Would you be surprised if you came across yet another reason to not eat at Mc Donald's?

I Am Listening
Batman -Danny Elfman
The Times They Are A-Changin'- Bob Dylan
Ed Is Dead- The Pixies
Shake For Me- Howlin' Wolf
I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself- The White Stripes
Isobel- Bjork
Overture- The Who

After that last post my profile views jumped from 95 to 114 and there was a dramatic spike in Page Views. I am not familiar enough with the data to know why but I'm guessing the phrase "hot young babes" didn't hurt.

Yes, Even For This Post
Jesus of Suburbia...- Green Day

I Am Disappointing

I just added a site meter to my blog. Is that the correct way to say it? Or do I simply say I added site meter since that is the name of the metric?
Maybe it's like Kleenex.
Anyway, I am fascinated by the data it provides. I had recently noticed a spike in my profile views and wondered what that meant to my overall number of site visits. I had thought I was getting visits mostly from the 2 or 3 friends who knew the blog existed or perhaps others who happened to come across the site through Blogger. I didn't think that number would ever be much more than 15 or 20. I guessed most people who visit the site do not check the profile so that an increase in profile views would mean a dramatic increase in overall hits. I don't have any data for visits prior to the 21st but since then I have discovered that people are stumbling upon this site looking for pornography.
The odd thing is, if you're looking for porn, there is nothing in the description of the blog that suggests I would have what you are looking for. No hot young babes, no free porn, no celebs exposed anywhere in the web results description. Still people doing specific searches for "heartbeat babes movies" thought my blog was worth a visit.
I appreciate the visits. I think I appreciate more that if they read the relevant post they may have been shamed into not finishing their search.

These Are Not Free Downloads
Barber of Seville Sinfonia- Rossini
When It's Good- Ben Harper
Let Down- Radiohead

You See What You See

Katrina drew out a lot of self-analysis and critical observations from many corners.
I mentioned before that I saw multi-level civic failure and a glimpse into the nature of power in our country.
Some people, Al Qaeda and some Christians to name a few, saw divine punishment.
However, the VP of the NRA, Wayne La Pierre, saw an opportunity to subvert democracy. That is, according to polls the majority of Americans support increased gun regulation and stricter enforcement of existing gun control laws but good old democracy and the 2nd amendment are no match for the lobbying power of the NRA. In the words of Wayne, images and stories of "citizens standing there alone when... no police protection was available, defending their lives and their propoerty with a firearm" aided the passage of a bill to give gun makers more protection than any other industry in the US.

Tom DeLay may be a... Tom DeLay may represent much of what is wrong with politics but he just did what I say I will do if I'm arrested. In his mug shot he is wearing a suit, tie and an ear to ear grin. This is a much better approach than the typical disheveled, shirtless, I should be on an episode of Cops, or locked up simply because I am scary look you generally get.

Although you could also say that his smile suggests how little regard he has for the rule of law. In fact, that's what I will say.

I Hear What I Hear
This Charming Man-The Smiths
You Are The Sunshine of My Life-Stevie Wonder
Picture of Jesus-Ben Harper
Thank You for Sending Me an Angel-Talking Heads
Excitable Boy-Warren Zevon
Low Light-Pearl Jam
Johnny Quest-The Reverend Horton Heat
Stuck With Me-Green Day

The Over Under

A lot of people hate our freedom so much they want it for themselves. This doesn't always sit well with our need for oil and our president's commitment to "stand with dissidents and exiles against oppressive regimes." It should be interesting (read horribly brutal and sad) to see how our ambivalence toward democracy plays out in oil rich Azerbaijan.

Here's the set up, a US supported autocratic regime, a struggling pro-democracy movement, an upcoming election , and oil- lots and lots of oil.

In another era they probably would have turned to the Soviets for help. It's a good thing they can't do that anymore. Phew.

You know, it's probably not even worth mentioning, but Osama Bin Laden is still... never mind.

Point Taken

Oh that would never happen.

Unless...

In light of the previous post, they're may be a market for yet another Bible "translation." The PTCV wherein sex, violence, profanity, adult themes, etc are all redacted. That's so mine- The Kid Friendly Bible, patent pending.

Someone To Watch Over Me and Link Crazy

I took my brother to see Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. He wanted to see American Pie 2 but I didn't think it appropriate so I took him to see something that wasn't much better. Now he's in jail.

Something similar happened with Aaron. I forget what he wanted to see, something with boobs I guess, but I objected and we rented Igby Goes Down instead. It was a good movie, but I don't think I showed very good judgment. Now he goes to APU.

(this is Aaron)

At the school where I used to teach, I frequently did not see eye to eye with the teachers in the Bible department. I don't see eye to eye with a lot of people but only a few have told me I'm damned; this department is where you would find them. I mentioned to one of these guys that Magnolia was a good movie. I actually told him that I thought it was a morally superior movie to Forrest Gump. He rented Magnolia that evening and his head exploded. It didn't really, but he later made his wife quit her job, he sold his house, bought an RV and moved to Florida to join a religious commune. That's true.

I admit, when it comes to movies, I have made some bad recommendations and choices. I guess this is because I don't have any hard and fast rules about what makes a movie worth seeing. I used to say I wouldn't see Jerry Bruckheimer productions, then there was Pirates of the Caribbean. I'm okay with that. There are some movies I won't bother seeing, but it is not necessarily because they have boobies, bad language or violence in them. This makes some people nervous if I am selecting a movie, but, those three errors mentioned notwithstanding, if I know my audience I can pick some pretty great movies.

That whole knowing your audience thing is key. The Parent's Television Council recently released their picks for the best and worst shows for families during prime time. It turns out what is good for families generally sucks for everybody else. Except Bernie Mac, that show is great. I wouldn't disagree that the shows on their worst list are typically not appropriate for children, sometimes they're not appropriate for anyone 'cos they're lame. But the PTC does more than make recommendations. They run campaigns to have shows completely removed from the air, making them unavailable for anyone. They call for boycotts of companies advertising on shows they don't like. Some things aren't for kids, some things aren't for anyone, but we shouldn't be pushing for a world where culture and discourse are reduced to only that which is suitable for seven year olds.

Kid Friendly Playlist
The One I [deleted]-Sarah Vaughan
A [deleted] and a [deleted]-U2
[deleted]-Smashing Pumpkins
Stepping Into [deleted]-Madlib
Thriller-[deleted]
[deleted] of [deleted]-Warren Zevon
The [deleted] Greats-Wilco
My [deleted]-Miles Davis
Untitled [deleted]-John Coltrane
[deleted] Good-Devo

What's The Point?

I don't ask that in a throw up your hands, rhetorical, I give up way. I mention it as a reminder: sometimes things have a point and we aren't always so good at getting it, the point that is.

Starbucks has begin putting quotes from celebrities of various type on their hot drink cups prefaced with the phrase "The Way I See It." What you get is something like, "The Way I see It...'cheese is pretty darn good'" or "The Way I See It...'you just spent too much on a beverage."" The point being, they are the perspectives of individuals.

Perspectives and values can be wrong, they can also be correct, but part of the process of learning wether they are correct or wrong is expressing them. Part of the learning wether we are wrong or not is listening to others. It's also just a part of being human; we have to, at some point, realize the world is full of a whole bunch of people who aren't us. Everyone else is a "not me." I, in turn am not you. The point being, if we even think of others, we generally forget how not me others are. Starbucks is throwing perspectives into the ether, at least the dense ether of the upper middle class that can afford four dollar drinks.

I like this campaign. Not everyone, though, is happy with this exchange of perspectives. It can be pretty threatening when other people's otherness is literally in our faces. About a month ago some Christians started boycotting Starbucks because it was promoting a homosexual agenda with one of the "The Way I See It's." That is, an other wrote this:

My only regret about being gay is that I repressed it for so long. I surrendered my youth to the people I feared when I could have been out there loving someone. Don’t make that mistake yourself. Life’s too damn short.

Armistead Maupin

This morning's USA Today has a story about Rick Warrren's perspective being on a Starbuck's cup. His perspective is basically his book in six sentences. While I wasn't a big fan of the phenomena that was his book, I am a fan of the way he has condensed it and offered it as a view to share with others. He says this:

You are not an accident. Your parents may not have planned you, but God did. He wanted you alive and created you for a purpose. Focusing on yourself will never reveal your real purpose. You were made by God and for God, and until you understand that, life will never make sense. Only in God do we discover our origin, our identity, our meaning, our purpose, our significance and our destiny.

I like that there is a place where both of these ideas can be expressed. It may be a bit tragic that it's happening on coffee cups and not in our churches, but with the ubiquity of Starbucks maybe it's just a matter of time until that happens. The point being, it's good that some people didn't like Maupin's perspective, some people aren't going to like Warren's, some people may begin to talk about these things, some people may begin to realize there's a point beyond what is said on the cups.

The truth is not on these cups. The truth is not something we accept or reject from a market of ideas or persepctives. Some poeple (Baylor University, Concerned Women of America, American Family Association) seem to be acting as if it is by saying, "If you say this, we won't play with you anymore" (boycotting Starbucks). By running from the simple expression of an idea, we seem to be saying that truth is about competing ideas and our ideas cannot compete. The point being, it's okay to talk about things. It's good to talk about things with people who don't think like you. It's good to have a forum where people are not going to automatically know and agree with your perspective. It's good to not hang on so tightly to our perspective that we cannot be drawn into the Truth.

By the way, my favorite "The Way I See It" is from David Cross:

Chances are you are scared of fictions.
Chances are you are only fleetingly happy.
Chances are you know much less than you think you do.
Chances are you feel a little guilty.
Chances are you want people to lie to you. Perhaps the answer lies on the side of a coffee cup.
You are lost.

And Then Sometimes There Isn't a Point
All Together Now-The Beatles
Do Ya-ELO
Walkin' After Midnight-Patsy Cline
Microphone Fiend-Eric B & Rakim
Flower-The Eels
Suffragette City-David Bowie
Trav'lin' Light-Billie Holiday
19-2000-The Gorillaz
The Heat's On-Dizzy Gillespie
Bluebird-Buffalo Springfield
Freedom of Choice-Devo
Jumping Around-The Rentals
That's The Way of The World-Earth, Wind, and Fire
Mi Chiamano Mimi-Angela Gheorgiu

Why I Want Cable TV

Conventional wisdom says you can get statistics to say whatever you want. That's not exactly true. You can trust others will not know enough to be critical of your methodology or you can use bland facts in twisted and misrepresentative ways, but this does not mean the statistics themselves say whatever you want them to. It just means you can sometimes fool people who don't know better or don't think to ask follow up questions.

Montel Williams did this the other day. He wanted me to be afraid of violent crime on board cruise ships. He said the FBI reported something like 20% of 300 maritime crimes were violent assaults. Okay, now I am a lazy researcher so did not look to get his actual numbers and when I was watching it, I did not think I would be writing about it so did not commit them to memory. So that being said. That's not much, I mean it may be sad for whomever is involved, but it's not that large a number. And how does this include cruise ships; does the FBI include statistics for ships of foreign registry? If I get drunk and punch someone on a harbor cruise that gets counted, but would a murder on a Norwegian cruise liner be counted? I don't know. Whatever, the point being Montel was trying to make a point but may have used the wrong data to make that point. He maybe did this on purpose, he might have just had careless writers. In any case, the statistics, combined with the story of the guest, the music, the images and the emotion all combine to give the impression that I have something to fear when I might actually be quite safe. But remember, just because data don't say what you want them to say doesn't mean they don't say something.

I should use a better example. Maybe I'll try to find one before I post this. I didn't.

Anyway, a similar thing is true with images and news. You can close crop a crowd picture to give the impression of greater numbers. Converesely, you can leave out any images and say "thousands attended" when it was tens of thousands. Both are true but one can downplay an event's significance. Check out the story behind this picture. It shows you how images can be manipulated to give a particular impression. In this case the lie was revealed.

News doesn't really exist does it? There is only what we retell and recreate. It is propaganda- for what I'm not sure, but it is similar to Mc Carthy's list of names, Nixon's dog, Clinton's confessions, and W's flight-suit which were all constructed events designed to give the impression of news and substance but were really just attempts at mediating public opinion. What we see on the news is removed from the actuality of an event and used as a prop to tell some other story. While the events may be important, the story we are trying to tell can be more revealing about who we are than the events themselves.

What's the point of all this? Well I want cable TV because I only get to see the Daily show rarely and now there is the Colbert Report to miss.

I love The Daily show because it has a greater and more trusted value than "the real news" not because of the stories it tells, but because how it satirizes the news by using the same methods as the media. And now the the new Colbert Report goes a step further and does this brilliantly. I have only seen what I can get on the website, and by reading accounts of it, (I'm a super nerd) but it is not only hilarious, it is also the perfect counter narrative to what we believe to be news. When Colbert says,"On this show your voice will be heard, in the form of my voice" or "I don't trust books, they're all fact, no heart. That's what's pulling our country apart today. We are divided between those who think with their head and those who know with their heart" he's not just offering a send-up of the self important media and exposing their self-serving narcissism but critiquing the general doubt and self-centered universe it has created. I love it.

I guess I left a lot hanging here. What is the story we're telling about ourselves? Who is this propaganda for? Oh well.

Trying to construct an appearance of hipness with my playlist
Respect Yourself-The Staple Singers
Chain of Fools-Aretha Franklin
Let it Roll-Hieroglyphics
1921-The Who
Offend in Every Way-The White Stripes
In Heaven-The Pixies
God Only Knows-The Beach Boys
Neptune, The Mystic-Gustav Holst

My Anniversay Weekend

This weekend was Cyndi's and my 5th anniversary. It may not seem that long to be married but we think it is long enough to have had a successful marriage if she should wise up and leave me.

We like to imagine how we might have come to marrying each other in an alternate universe. If we hadn't met when we did, would we ever? If we were to meet each other today, would we end up marrying? I may get in trouble for saying this, but I don't think so.

As it is, we met in high school through Willy, a mutual friend. Even though he didn't have a car, he offered Cyndi and some other girls a ride to the movies so he could spend time with her best friend, Christi. So, I stole (with the intention of returning) my friend's mom's car and, as an unlicensed driver, drove Cyndi, Willy, Christi, and another girl, Heather, around town that night.

Cyndi was immediately impressed that I was driving a stolen car without a license. High school girls can be pretty lame. Later, she would think picking her up from school and riding around on my scooter were awesome. High school girls of the early 90's were especially lame.

Almost from that evening on, we were always together. We didn't date each other. We each dated other people; I dated her best friend. But we were always spending time with each other. We had very different backgrounds so would argue. We argued about the nature of revelation in the Bible, why Pirate Radio sucked, the death penalty. We would each turn corners in our thinking and never saw our disagreements as threats to our friendship. We would fight and actually seek forgiveness from the other. We could laugh at and with each other, call each other on our mistakes, encourage each other, learn form each other, so in college we started making out with each other.

Now we're married.

Other than family, there isn't another person I have spent more time with. Who I am now is such a product of who I have been with her, that I don't know what life would be like if I hadn't known her all these years. I don't think we would meet. I don't think we would start "dating." I don't think we would run into each other at Trader Joe's. We wouldn't both reach for the same package of Gouda and touch hands then look in each other's eyes and know "it was meant to be." We would be somewhere else, perhaps as happy, perhaps not. We might pass on the street; I could be stuck behind her in traffic and never know.

I like that it has happened. I'm glad this is the course we've taken and she is now stuck with me.


Mr. Pitiful-Otis Redding
Home Coming, et al-Green Day
Days Like This Keep Me Warm-The Polyphonic Spree
Get Up Stand Up-Bob Marley & the Wailers
Cry Baby Cry-The Beatles
When You See the Light-Pete Yorn
Pilate-Green Day

Come Up and See Me Some Time

When my wife was in college a boy approached her in one of her classes, handed her a note, and walked away. She panicked. She didn't want to read it in front of other people so she quickly gathered her belongings and ran to a restroom. She ducked into a stall and opened the note. I imagine that she held it in her clenched fists and had one eye closed as she slowly opened it. I imagine she had her hands just in front of her face and slowly peeled the pages of the note apart as if trying to sneak up on the words or prevent them from jumping off the paper. Somebody had asked her on a date. She failed that class because she never went back. You're right, it is a bit odd.

There are a couple of customers (remember, I work at Starbucks) that make me feel very uncomfortable because of the way we interact. A couple of ladies and one guy come quickly to mind. There are some customers with whom I am more friendly than others; but these three are not just friendly. They stare and leer. They make me feel creepy.

This Friday- hey, that's tomorrow- is my last shift there. A lot of people wish me well and say they will miss me. One customer gave me 2 sweet potato pies (one of my favorite pies). Some have hugged me (I don't think I would do that in their shoes). Another, a vocal and aggressive anti-theist, says he wants to "hang out." A lot of regulars have been tipping a little more. All in all, the end of my Starbucks life has been good. Except for one thing... so far. One of the leery ladies gave me her phone number. She said something like, "If you're ever so inclined (wink)..." and handed me a card. The situation struck me as so odd that I laughed. Then I tried to cover up my laugh with a cough. Then I changed the subject to the fact that her name on the card and the name she always gives are different. Then I mentioned my wife. Then I said, "I gotta go" and went to the back of the store. I kinda felt like a jerk.

I think I can sympathize with my wife. Don't get me wrong, what she did in college is crazy. But I can sympathize.

Meeting people, making yourself vulnerable, sharing histories, intimacy of any kind are all risky things any way we do it. There are some interactions that make the risks of human intercourse that much riskier, even so we're supposed to be intimate with each other. We're supposed to be connected and dependent. (Am I going to start talking about sex again?- maybe- I think I'm definitely going to sound like an old man though)

I don't know anyone alive that has preached or taught on chastity. But then, I don't know a lot of things. So if the average church goer even knows the word, I would bet they think immediately of sex. That's too bad. It's a much more beautiful concept than the image of a chastity belt or celibacy imply. It has more to do with being human with each other- in the relations made possible in Christ.

I really have to go... I want to write more about this. Every time, well most of the time, I say, "more on this later" I don't get back to it. Oh well. Maybe.

If you checked that "Mexicans" link you may have seen that Danny hasn't posted anything in almost a month. How 'bout putting some pressure on him to write something? I'll post his phone number if he doesn't write something soon.

What's Bouncing Off My Eardrums?
Chameleon-Herbie Hancock
Doing It to Death-James Brown
Anarchy in the UK-The Sex Pistols
The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill-The Beatles
Stop Draggin' Around-Lenny Kravitz
Don't Stop-Fleetwood Mac
Born As Ghosts-Rage Against the Machine
St Louis Blues-Louis Prima
I Could Stay Here Forever-Frank Black
You Dropped A Bomb On Me-The Gap Band

This Truly is a Golden Age

A few years ago Mc Donald's came up with what they described as their "adult" sandwich. Remember the Arch Deluxe? It was supposed to be a superior quality sandwich for those with adult tastes- read good taste. They don't have it anymore and I suspect it is because people don't go to Mc Donald's for good food. However it may also be because people associate the word "adult" with other things. Adult movies, adult themes, adult sandwiches- I'll pass. In any case, I assume everyone reading this is, if not an adult, at least mature enough to handle a topic that some might consider "adult." (Though if you wait to think about these things until you're an adult you're going to have problems).

On to the adult topic-

I am working on a conceptual music thing for one of our worship services and searched for heartbeat sounds to download. In addition to reaffirming my belief that "free" has no meaning in our culture (or that I am still familiarizing myself with the "newspeak" definiton) I learned that there are people (probably exclusively men) for whom naked girls are not enough, they must be naked girls with heart beats you can hear. There in the first page of search results for "sounds heartbeat" were pages where I could hear baby heartbeats, buy equipment to hear baby heartbeats, read studies about heartbeats, buy software to analyze heartbeats, hear how a mothers heartbeat sounds to a baby, download 100 heartbeat sound effects for "free," and (I won't be including a link for this) Heartbeat Babes, a site for heartbeat or stethoscope fetishists with heartbeat WAV files. Okay.

If there is something so gruesome, so horrible, so perverse that you are afraid to even think it, there is probably a web site and a whole web community devoted to it. Similarly, if you can think of something to satirically critique the absurdity of our depravity, there is probably someone out there who is wholeheartedly into it. Heartbeat fetishists are somewhere in that mix.

But wait, there's more. If you read the online magazine Salon, then you may have already seen this article on people (almost exclusively men) who buy super realistic dolls for pretty much one purpose. You may literally shudder if you read the article. It's a fascinating article, but be warned: it's super creepy.

Porn is an interesting thing. I don't know if the hyper realistic dolls are technically pornography, I'm going to say they are because they have the same purpose. I don't know what is popular as porn in other cultures, but it seems in our culture that men are so conditioned to dominate and be controlling that porn as we know it here is an inevitable outcome. I don't mean dominance as in order or hierarchy, but position as a tool of exploitation and consumption. Men are taught to grasp after this (I don't say women can escape this in our culture, but it seems a cultural trait of masculinity is to be dominant and able to bend others to your will). This isn't meant to systematically describe everything in our uber-sexualized culture, but it seems a feature of porn, especially if we see these dolls as pornography, is the desire to fulfill the ultimate cultural goal of abstracting human interaction into a medium for pleasure. These dolls are perfect examples of that- I know people who treat real humans little better than the descriptions in the Salon article.

This isn't how we are to know each other. In fact we don't know each other, if we see others and ourselves as objects to dominate or be dominated or consume. I wonder if that's why naked ladies aren't enough and it becomes necessary to make them uniquely "personal." That is, maybe a generic naked lady isn't enough so you have to add naked ladies with heartbeats you can hear, or naked ladies with wigs, naked ladies with big feet, naked ladies with hard hats, or naked ladies with whatever, so that they are specific to a particular fantasy.

If I wasn't concerned about what I would find, I think a fun game would be to do a search for "naked lady 'fill in the blank.'"

This isn't to excuse the porn phenomena or to say other cultures don't experience it. I am just suggesting that porn is a unique manifestation of sex as object in our culture. Sex selling cars or hamburgers can be understood similarly. Somebody write a paper on that.

A Very Adult Playlist
Here Comes the Sun-The Beatles
Canned Heat-Jamiroquai
Half a Person-The Smiths
Guerilla Radio-Rage Against the Machine
Jimmy Jazz-The Clash
The Flower Duet-Joan Sutherland
Insomnia-The Rentals
Evil-Howlin' Wolf
Theme From Narc-The Pixies
I Believe in a Thing Called Love-The Darkness
What's Happening Brother-Marvin Gaye
Billie Jean-Michael Jackson
Houses of The Holy-Led Zeppelin
Think-James Brown
Little Animal-The Raveonettes
How to Disappear Completely-Radiohead
Mr. Day-John Coltrane
City of Blinding Lights-U2

For God's Sake, Turn off the TV

I watch a lot of the 700 Club. I am fascinated by it and the other shows on TBN; I can only partly pretend I watch with a sense of condescending irony. In reality I am engrossed. I watch it the same way I might watch ants swarm and pull apart a beetle. Not to say, "Dude, that's messed up," but recognizing that it's real, and though foreign, more familiar than I always admit.

If it was high concept comedy, the 700 Club would be among the best shows on TV. The hair and wardrobe are perfect. The accents perfectly match the comments. Discussion quickly goes from murdered babies to Robertson's diet milkshakes. But it's real, and that's crazy.

So I watch. I watch Pat Robertson. I watch Hal Lindsey. I watch Jan Crouch. I watch Benny Hinn. I call my wife over and ask if she can believe what she's seeing. She tells me to change the channel. I watch and get angry. I watch and laugh. I watch with a sense of superiority and judgment. Can you believe he just said that? Look at her hair? How much do you want to bet she's in the hospital in a week? It's like pro wrestling to me. Man, that's arrogant and foolish.

This isn't a side show or some off the beaten path diversion. Pat Robertson is quoted as an authority on NPR without debate. The eschatology of Hal Lindsey is the culturally assumed view, even among non-Christians, with no alternative in sight. This is the public face of the church. It may be that Christians will always look wacky to outsiders- that's fine. But it's not fine to look wacky and misrepresent Christ. Hopefully, Mother Teresa, St Francis, and Martin Luther King do seem odd and distinct. But hopefully not for the same reasons that Pat Robertson does.

I want to dismiss it all as nonsense. Who watches the 700 Club anyway? Surely no one would look to Jan Crouch with her tarantula eyelashes and pink cotton candy hair for spiritual guidance. But people do. And that's a problem. I am concerned with how we look to those outside the church, but not more than how we exist as the real Body of Christ on earth.

What am I even saying? Only that Pat Robertson seems to be getting a lot of air time these days outside of his regular TBN audience. A lot of people have a "Left Behind" view of history. I suspect some people would think of Benny Hinn when you say "Christian" before they would Jesus.

Somewhere in this is a struggle.

I Miss You-Bjork
I Can See For Miles-The Who
I'll Sleep When I'm Dead-Warren Zevon
Fitter Happier-Warren Zevon
In The Summertime-Mungo Jerry

I Will Die

I am allergic to be stings. I recently learned a bee can fly 15 MPH. In high school, I could run approximately 17 MPH. I know I could not run that fast now. The supermarket by my house is currently home to a large swarm of bees.

L'shanah Tovah

I guess as evidence of the significant influence Hebrew thought has upon this nation, we are at the turning of both the Jewish Year and the Federal fiscal year.

Interesting thing about this fiscal year change:
There is currently not an approved budget. Though a single party controls both houses of Congress and the executive branch (suggesting it would be much easier to push through your legislative agenda) no one is particularly willing to give up their pet financial projects. There is much debate over who has to give up what if we are going to reduce taxes (though the reality of those cuts should be discussed) while we increase military spending.

So they passed stop gap measures to keep the government running. (Back in the 90's when Republicans took control of Congress for the first time in decades, they attempted to shut down the Federal government by withholding budget approval- turns out most people like the Federal government when they realize their taxes actually go to so called "goods and services"- this was a very unpopular move). These measures simply provide funding for Federal government programs despite the absence of a budget. So this means they have temporary funding while they are technically unfunded- with me so far?

Not every Federal agency is unfunded. National parks, and Congress itself managed to get spending measures enacted for the next fiscal year. Phew! But about ten other measures were missed. So to avoid a shut down of, say a Veteran's hospital, or the Coast Guard, or ending death benefits to families of dead military the stop gap resolution maintains temporary funding at current levels unless a lower spending level has already, though tentatively been approved. Now what types of programs do you suppose would have lower spending levels? Programs that will help poor old people buy heating fuel this winter for one. Whatever- Like old people ever die from weather extremes anyway- and what are the odds of oil prices going up this winter anyway?

Why does this matter? Well theses cuts have come about without Congressional approval. These are proposed cuts. They haven't been approved because A.) the Senate has been busy and B.) these are unpopular cuts. Like I said most people like the Federal government and don't want the cuts; when you connect a fiscal decision to real life, people get a bit squeamish. That is, it's one thing to campaign on lower taxes and fiscal "restraint." It's quite another to slap food out of grandma's mouth, or take real people off dialysis machines, or leave cops unpaid, or not inspect incoming shipping containers, or put someone's education on hold because their federal grant is gone. Congress has not approved these cuts, but the spending levels will go down as if they had.

One senator in particular found this particularly unconstitutional, or immoral, or disgusting, or politically stupid. Whatever it was, he suggested the measure be amended to not reduce spending in these particular categories. Now, if that was going to happen, the House would have to come back together and they had already left for the weekend. This is a typical practice of the House. Do something potentially unpopular and leave town, or save the really unsavory practices and report releases for late on Thursdays and Fridays so they can skip town and the media, who are looking forward to the weekend just like everyone else, don't pay particular attention.

So today, community service block grants, for example, have 50% less funding because it was too much to ask the House to come back. And even though it's 90 degrees here in Southern California today, it's already freezing in the Midwest and maybe grandpa can afford to heat his house, and maybe he can't. Maybe he'll pay for gas and forgo a meal or two. These things clearly are not important enough to ask the House to come back and discuss.

You know what the House did find important enough to come back into town for recently? You want to know what was so important that representatives came racing back into town to get their names in the Record, despite the Easter holiday? Terry [expletive] Schiavo.

I don't expect any government to be the church. I don't expect a representative government to be any better than the people it represents. But bad is bad, even when it comes from people you expect to be bad.

This isn't about Republicans or Democrats- it's about people for whom power over other's lives is nothing.

In the turning of the Jewish year, one is supposed to be acutely aware of one's sin and anticipate the work of God that atones for that and makes possible a better future. Maybe we should connect some dots.

I Believe; Help My Unbelief

I think I agree with dbravo's response to my post. As I explain the way I agree with it, others may say we see it differently.
I don't.

Some will probably be familiar with this story:
I lost my car keys in a park once. I gave up trying to find them and Cyndi, who was not my wife at the time, asked if I prayed to find them. I said something like, "No- I think God has better things to do than find my keys- and if I'm not praying for bigger, more serious things, than I'd better not dare pray for something as stupid and trivial as keys." She thought that if it was important to me, it would be important to God. I thought that the reverse should be true. I should not be trying to convince God that what I think is important is really all that important, rather I should spend more time having my will and mind conformed to God's and I could not see my keys fitting into that picture.
Long story short, she said if I wouldn't pray for me finding my keys, she would. I said she could go ahead and waste her time but feel guilty about wasting God's.

I went back the next day for one last look before I spent the money on re-keying my car and while I was there, a couple of kids from a school adjoining the park walked by. I asked if they had seen any keys laying around. They paused and looked at each other, then said a mister so and so had found some keys. They took me to him and my keys. Man, I hate that story.
I do think we fail to pray because of a lack of faith, and I'm going to discuss faith pretty broadly here. It's not always because we believe God cannot accomplish such and such, it may sometimes be because of that. But I am sometimes afraid to pray because of what God can do. I confess my failure to pray for my brother in the last post in the context of the prophetic Psalm referenced because it's hard for me to accept that my brother being in jail is an answer to prayer- I lack faith there. If my brother is hardened to this, what will happen if I keep praying for him? God's not nice.

Additionally, real earnest prayer requires action on my part- not just the praying, but responding. To a certain extent, I've worked through that last part in my life. I am not as spiritually lazy as I have been in the past. I know and desire that when I pray I will be an instrument in God's work. I now fear what will happen to people if I pray for them and they continue to reject God. That doesn't always stop me, but it makes me tentative- I lack faith here too. How much breaking can I watch my brother go through?

So there is no fruit to my labor,
There is nothing around me that I can use,
Everything is dead and barren,
But God is salvation

Farewell Ride-Beck
We Are All Made of Stars-Moby
White Room-Cream
Eep Opp Ork Ah-Ah-Violent Femmes
Village Ghetto Land-Stevie Wonder
Sylvio-Bob Dylan
Bodies-Sex Pistols